Pandas Everywhere!!!

what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

When life gives you lemons...you probably just found lemons.

Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Will gropes Ebola victims

What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

A seal walks into a club.

What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Why was the man named Thomas? Because that was his name

Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

who eats pencils asians

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...