What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

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Real jokes.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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knock knock your gay

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What's brown, hairy and goes up and down? A kiwifruit in an elevator.

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Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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sweaty black guy

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Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

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Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

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Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

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Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

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Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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