What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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Q: What do cows do on the weekends? A: They go to the Moovies Q:What do pigs do on the weekends? A:Go Bowling

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

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Dozer has a soul

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What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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What's so funny about an anti-joke? Nothing.

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Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

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Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

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A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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