Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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69

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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oh hiya come in

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Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

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Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

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Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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knock knock who's there? julian julian who? julian gonzalez

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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