Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

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Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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Women's rights.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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So this is an anti-joke website, right?

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Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Poop

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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