Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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ps3

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

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A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

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Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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