Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

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How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

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whats the boys name that has no legs no arms and no eyes? lucky

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What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

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Womens rights.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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404 Error: Joke not found

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How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

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Why does Helen Keller only masturbate with one hand? Because she's moaning with the other.

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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What's more dangerous than bungee jumping without a rope? Getting into a car with Ben Colbert.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Whats 0+0 0

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How do you fit 100 charizards into a bus? Put them into pokeballs. Otherwise, there would be no possible way because Charizards are such large creatures.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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