Osama Bin Laden dies.

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

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Hey you want to hear a joke? Oh well. Goodbye

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

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How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops