What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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