Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

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a little girl gets raped

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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hi

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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W.N.B.A.

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What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

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why did Louisa go black and never go back? She got hit by a truck

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

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Sea World Japan.

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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how do you reunite the beatles 2 bullets

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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