How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +3

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

if u dislike this u r most likely depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

you are gay

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

25

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So dont touch it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock! Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is brown and smells? Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -5

knock knock come in

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

wuts at the end of the world? nothing the earth is spherical and therefore does not have an end

thumb_up thumb_down -9

French people

thumb_up thumb_down -9

SNICHOLS AND DOOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops