What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

A polish, english and african man each were standing on a skyscraper. The african man jumped and died. The polish and enlgish men called 999.

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

Women Drivers.

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

The WNBA

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

A Black man walks out of a KFC.

How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

women's rights

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...