What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

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whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

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What do you find....... there's a..........

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Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

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An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

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what did the book say to the lamp? nothing because BOOKS CANT TALK

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69

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How do you fit 90 Jews in a Volkswagen Bug? You can't.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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alcoholism kills

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

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what is brown and sticky? a stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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