"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I am a real homosexual

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How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

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Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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George W. Bush

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jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Cause 7 is black.

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Men's rights

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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