I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

I have read and agree to terms of service.

Jack and Jill climb a tall hill to get some water from the well for there farther who has been working in the fields. Jack trips and hits his hell on a rock and Jill promptly calls 911 and stays with him until help arrives.

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

As a wise man once told me... "natives."

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

drugs.

Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...