What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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Obama

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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anus soup

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

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How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops