STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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A Black man walks out of a KFC.

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how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A Kinect

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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