Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? who cares even if they could screw it in it wouldnt work because there to poor to aford electricity

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

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A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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Carlton

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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