chuck norris

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why did the man die? he got shot

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

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Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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Hitler

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One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

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marble

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

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Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

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A man buys free health care...

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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