Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

Please don't rape me.

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

If TACOS are Mexican PASTA is Italian HAMBURGER is American Then what is pizza???..... Dough, Cheese and Sauce Just Kidding, that was bad..... Turtles..... :D

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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