Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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