Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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I have an idea! You leave.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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