What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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