Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

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Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

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How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

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what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

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What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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This is on of those few moments where my guts and attitude leave me feeling as if the entire world is against me... ...Then I cant help but to smirk and think... The world against me? Finally a worthy challenge... Such a great day... Nero because fuck morals: Friends and not so friends do not call me Black Metal because I listen to power rock, my mother high on drugs attacked my wife claiming she was Satan, I killed my angel dust empowered mother, felt as if the world was against me... ...Such a great day... "I killed my father too but you dont hear me whining about it!" And of course... ...Rest in pieces oh "dear" mother", at least you did one good thing, you gave birth to your undertaker, while I killed you to end my lifelong misery, My only regret is ending yours... Now I request you all think I am a monster and pretend we live in a world where all parents are nice and good... You already deluded yourself? Perhaps you should thumb me up instead then.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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