Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Wtf?

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Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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