We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A giraffe walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?!" to witch he replied " I've just been mugged outside.".

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Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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I'm Polish.

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What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

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Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

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Why couldn't the surgeon perform surgery? Because he was in court being sued due to the fact that he administered too much anesthesia to a patient, who later died of overdose..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

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Why did the book fly to Cambodia? It was on a plane that was delivering educational material to third world countries to enhance their schools and increase their literacy.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

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What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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