What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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