Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

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how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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