Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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