whats hairy and crys your mom

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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Where was the black child's dad? At work. He'll be back around 6:30

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Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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