How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

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whats 2=2? gonorrhea.

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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