A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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