Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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