What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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