What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

Cancer

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

I don't drink. I'm not 21.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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