What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

thumb_up thumb_down -45

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -59

a man was shot.... he died

thumb_up thumb_down +40

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

thumb_up thumb_down +36

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

thumb_up thumb_down +26

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops