Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

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Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

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What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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what do u call a turtle with no shell? Larry

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops