What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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There was a joke, one sentance, and no punchline.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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