What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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