whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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What do you get when you cross a child and jt Rape

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Why couldn't the blind man drive? His sight impairment made him unable to fulfill the task without harming himself and potentially other people.

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What do you call a bench full of white people The NBA

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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uhyuyuyhyuuuhuyuhh rice crispies

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knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

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Why is John single? Because women are materialistic.

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why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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What do you call a boy that was once a boy, but no longer is a boy? A Man

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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OBAMA and the DEMOCRATS

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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A man is driving down a back country road in an old beat up car going 30 mph when he notices a black horse and a white horse keeping pace with him. They keep up with him for a few miles before passing him and turning into a farm on the road. The man is quite impressed with the horses speed and follows them to the farmer and offers the farmer living there the horses in exchange for the car. The farmer says the horses are bad luck but accepts the trade, and the man walks off with the horses. The man then enters the horses in a big horse race and puts a lot of money on them. The horses immediately take the lead and are about to finish the race when the black horse trips and the white horse goes back to pick him up and end up losing. The man is furious and returns the horses to the farmer and gets his car back. The next day another man is driving in a nicer car down the same road going 50 mph when the black horse and the white horse run right past his car. Impressed with the horses speed the man trades his car to the farmer who warns him about the horses. Ignoring the farmer's warning the man enters the horses in a new race. The horses once again take the lead and are close to finishing first and second when the black horse trips and the white horse goes and picks him up again once again losing their lead. The man angrily returns the horses in exchange for his car. The next day a third man drives down the same road in a brand new sports car. While he's testing the limits of the car the horses catch up to him and run with him. Surprised by the speed of the horses the man speeds up in his car but the horses manage to keep up. The horses eventually run past the man and turn into their farm, and the man looks down and realizes that the horses had been running faster than 120 mph. The man goes to the farmer and offers his car in exchange for the horses. The farmer accepts but gives the man the same warning he gave the two men earlier. The new man just like the other two men ignores the warning and enters the horses into a race and bets a lot of money on them. This time the horse take the lead out of the gate but feet from the finish line the white horse trips and falls. The black horse seeing this goes back and helps him up once again losing the race. The man is disgusted and releases the horses into the city in hopes that they'll die out there. The two horses are wander into a bar, and the bartender looks at them and says: "hey you two why the long face?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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