Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

A cockroach walks into a bar. The bar seems to have a pest problem.

What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water jack fell down and broke his neck and he was dead... The End

What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

whats green and slimy? green slim

Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Mitt Romney's economic plan for America.

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a rapist.

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

Q:What's the difference between a turtle and a cat? A: One's a turtle and the other is a cat....

No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

Why is this site popular? Because people don't read the terms of service.

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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