Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

There's a cat, a dog, a rat and a goat... I don't know how the goat got in there?

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

Why did Dave stop going to the laundromat? Because he was a suicide bomber.

why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

knock knock who's there who who who who who what are you a retarded owl

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

Want to hear a joke? No.

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

Whats worse than being rapped by a giant scorpion. Being gangbanged by a couple giant scorpions

A muslim walks into a gay bar.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

FATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLE FATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPE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ATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLEFATPEOPLETATPEO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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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