What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Whats fat and gay joe diragi

What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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