What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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