What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

-Why was six afraid of seven? -Because seven's a rapist

Knock Knock Who's There? Im Black Im Black Who Open The Door Now Pancakes Granted

person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

Roses are red Violets are blue Join the bro army! BROFIST! http://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie :D

hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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