One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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