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thumb_up thumb_down -28

"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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What's the connection between Obama and Michael Jackson? They both want to be a girl.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

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Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

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Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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