What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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