why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He stepped on a piece of a shattered bottle from a bar fight. Don't worry, though, it was just a little cut and he felt fine after a few beers.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

race-car = rac-ecar

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

time to spruce up!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops