Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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