Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops