In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

civil rights

Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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