I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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tea with milk?

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

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Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops