Japan

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...