What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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