Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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ERROR 3045: This joke has gone bankrupt and Is laying in the hospital//:: THE CAUSE: OBAMA CARE

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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Why is it hard to see a black man in the night? Because its dark out, and he's BLACK.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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Guide on how to make the color yellow for yourself! First, you grab green, and then you remove all the blue... AND YELLOW COLOR GET! While you are reading this I am fingering your sister... WHAAAAT? She is only a baby you say? Well... Moral: Ugh... The ending was so wrong in so many ways... I should totally rewrite this and call it EXTENDED DIRECTORS EDITION... I cant bother... Oren The laroM naM! OR !naM laroM ehT oreN So anyway, Christiaaaans, its ask and you shall receive right? Virgin Mary is not virgin anymore because I asked if you know what I mean... ;) NOW FIRE THE STORM OF RED THUMBS MWAHAHAHAHAHA I AM THE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALPYSE! I AM THE RED DRAGON.... OR EVEN WORSE... I AM THE DARK LORD SANTA!!!!!! Nevermind, ugh... Santa is just too disgusting, sorry, I meant Satan, phew, thats a relief on my concience... I should probably take my finger out of your sister... ...And insert the GREAT BIGGUS DICKUS! Your sister only two years? Ugh... Well, SHE WILL GROW INTO IT... Ugh, I dont wanna post this, but I bet Ryu sometimes dont want to go HADOUUUUKEEEEEEN Just so a slow projectile takes of like 2 percent of his enemies life... SO... One TWO TH... Oh wait, I must solvemedia first. Ice to meet you? Thats pathetic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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