Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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Guide on how to make the color yellow for yourself! First, you grab green, and then you remove all the blue... AND YELLOW COLOR GET! While you are reading this I am fingering your sister... WHAAAAT? She is only a baby you say? Well... Moral: Ugh... The ending was so wrong in so many ways... I should totally rewrite this and call it EXTENDED DIRECTORS EDITION... I cant bother... Oren The laroM naM! OR !naM laroM ehT oreN So anyway, Christiaaaans, its ask and you shall receive right? Virgin Mary is not virgin anymore because I asked if you know what I mean... ;) NOW FIRE THE STORM OF RED THUMBS MWAHAHAHAHAHA I AM THE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALPYSE! I AM THE RED DRAGON.... OR EVEN WORSE... I AM THE DARK LORD SANTA!!!!!! Nevermind, ugh... Santa is just too disgusting, sorry, I meant Satan, phew, thats a relief on my concience... I should probably take my finger out of your sister... ...And insert the GREAT BIGGUS DICKUS! Your sister only two years? Ugh... Well, SHE WILL GROW INTO IT... Ugh, I dont wanna post this, but I bet Ryu sometimes dont want to go HADOUUUUKEEEEEEN Just so a slow projectile takes of like 2 percent of his enemies life... SO... One TWO TH... Oh wait, I must solvemedia first. Ice to meet you? Thats pathetic.

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I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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A guy walks into a bar

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

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Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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