why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

thumb_up thumb_down +14

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +10

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops