What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

woman's rights

What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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