How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

a irish man walks past a bar

A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

I asked her where you were.

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

If you just read this, You're dead.

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What's big and messy? A big mess

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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