what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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