How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

how does wasabi stay open during summer because tiffany is a nice person

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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