A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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