I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

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A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops