What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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this website is a bad joke

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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