Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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i saw amango it splootered

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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