If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Cripples are lame.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops