Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

Latvia isn't a joke

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

What are kids supposed to do in American classrooms if a nuke hits nearby? Hide under the desk. (This is a fact) Moral: Like that is gonna help... seriously that is ridiculous!

Why do nascar drivers wreck Jeff gordon's bad racing Stupidity And kyle buschs great wrecking ability

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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