Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

A postal worker creeps past a sleeping bulldog. The dog does not wake up, and the mail is delivered successfully.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

What the person say to the other Person? Hi.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

Dog walks into a bar Asked for a hard cider Got it

whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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