Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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