My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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roses are red poo is poo

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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