What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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