why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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