A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

What is black, white, and red all over? The Wall

What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

Golf.

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

I agree to the terms and conditions

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Who's gay? Justin Beaver

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

If the 49ers won the superbowl

Whats pink red and silver? A baby chewing on reason blades. Whats pink red silver and smells bad? Same baby two weeks later.

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

"Knock knock" Come in!

What's long hard and black A drain pipe

What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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