Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Death by kayak

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

knock knock Goodbye

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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