A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Yo mamas so greasy that she has a beard

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A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

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Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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Why do people like vacations? To get out of your family

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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how many pancakes does it take to build a dog house? none boats don't have wheels.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops