What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

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Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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