Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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Female Orgasms

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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say it ten times fast: oh

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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The 80's called. They need their couch back.

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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