Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

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So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

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Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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