How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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i saw amango it splootered

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When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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can you pass the soap?

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If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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