What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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