How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

asdasdasdasd

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

Refridgerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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