What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have HIV you should probably get yourself checked...

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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