How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Anti jokes are stupid Anti jokes are dumb I'm a pedophile, You better run.

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

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what is white on top and black on bottom Society What is black on top and white on bottom Rape

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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