A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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