Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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