My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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whats my name? Matt

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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Ross.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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