Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

What's brown an sticky Shit

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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