Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

i'm an inbred jew - Barras

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

whats red and hard to eat a brick.

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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