Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

Why does Joel's breathe smell?

What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

Why did the Mexican fail his english test? Because he had studied for an inadequate amount of time and proceeded to fornicate with many women, also preventing him from sleeping for the advised 7-8 hours a night.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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