a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hey Shea

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Wanna hear a joke? no

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops