A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

You say tomayto, I say ecstasy.

:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

If you have a stroke, call 000

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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