What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

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knock knock who's there? faith

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If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

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Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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