Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but it was delicious.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops