It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

A boy with red hair is happy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

A dancer walks into a barre

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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