A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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i dont fisish anythi

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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