Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Welcome to the anti-joke Olympics! As you can see ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are starting to look very excited as the "who can look the most bored" competition is just about to begin! We are terribly sorry to announce that as for the butterfly style contest, all of the butterflies drowned :( While at this corner, we can see these contestants have been waiting patiently for hours for the "who is the most impatient" contest to begin! While over here, none of our contestants have yet to make a chicken cross the road and tell them why! In the meantime watch as we mistreat these Jews in order to find out what is worse, the holocaust or a worm in your apple! So far our contestants with worms in their apples are complaining more, but dying significantly less, how will this end! How exciting! Finally our swing contest has been cancelled as Sally refuses to get on it! Moral: BUT WILL IT BLEND!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops