Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

I read the terms of service.

What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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