There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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