So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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knock knock Who's there Hi, im a memeber of the Church of Latter Day Saints. Id like to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

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What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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