A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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antonio has a penis head.lol

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops