What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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