The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...